Non-Traditional Relationships I Love
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| Image description: San (to the left) and Ashitaka (to the right and further forward) from the Japanese animated film Princess Mononoke. These two characters and their story represent a terrific departure from what we're often taught to expect when it comes to character dynamics and relationships, which you know is something I tend to love. Today, I'd like to talk about a few such relationships in media - unintentionally centering on a few animated films - and how these unique ideas about relationships could lead to better media of all kinds. |
If there’s one thing I love discussing when it comes to
media, it’s stories and characters that are wholly unique. Whether that means
they see the world in unique ways or their personalities are one in a million,
I love things that are anything but ordinary. When it comes to my aspec
analysis, I especially love it when stories and characters swerve away from
what many people consider “normal” or “expected,” serving up something that is
unexpected and, oftentimes, refreshing. A lot of my favorite stories and
characters fall under this umbrella, but today – since it’s so close to
Valentine’s Day – it felt appropriate to look at my favorite unique,
unexpected, and completely non-traditional romantic (or romance adjacent) relationships.
Recently, I talked a little bit about some of my favorite
non-traditional romantic relationships in Korean dramas, so it’s no surprise
that this is a favorite topic of mine. Even before that post, I’ve actually
been thinking about the idea of non-traditional relationships for a while now
and knew I wanted to discuss a few of my favorites. Quite by accident, I
decided to focus on three that just so happen to all be from animated films. I
think this is in large part because I ended up thinking a lot about one of the
couples on this list especially and it just sort of snowballed from there.
When it comes to animation, the medium allows for creators
to explore many different types of relationships because they’re able to
explore many different kinds of characters. Look at any Disney or Pixar movie,
for example, and you’ll see talking animals, robots, toys, humanized emotions,
etc. Therefore, I could talk at length about any number of non-traditional
relationships in that sense; however, for the sake of today’s analysis, I’d
like to focus on three human relationships to show that this type of non-traditional
storytelling can be found in human couples too. Each of these pairs are very
different from one another and their “non-traditional” vibes are different too,
but I believe they all share the commonality of allowing us to look at relationships
through new and unique lenses, which is very valuable indeed.
Howl and Sophie
from Howl’s Moving Castle
The story follows a young woman named Sophie, a normal girl
who lives in a world of magic, demons, and wizards, but whose own quiet life
primarily centers around working in the hat shop left to her by her late
father. Her normal life is turned upside-down, however, when she meets Howl –
the eponymous wizard who is rumored to live in a magical mechanical marvel
of a house and preys on the hearts of beautiful women. This seemingly chance encounter
draws the ire of a sorceress known as the Witch of the Wastes, who in her
jealousy curses Sophie to become an old woman. Determined to break the curse
and yet also finding herself newly emboldened by it, Sophie sets off for
answers and gets caught up in the war that’s brewing between her kingdom and
the neighboring one, a conflict which Howl himself is actively meddling in.
Although a romance does eventually form between Howl and
Sophie, the path to get there is anything but traditional, thanks in part to
Sophie being cursed for a large majority of the film. However, even more than
the curse, both Sophie and Howl must go through a great deal of personal growth
throughout the course of the story, which necessitates that they develop themselves before
their romance does. Additionally, their romance is so deeply about what lies within
one’s heart and finding value in the parts of themselves they hide, which I
believe is a poignant and beautiful message. When Sophie and Howl first meet,
Howl is handsome, suave, and seemingly perfect; as time goes on, she begins to
see other sides of him which are far from perfect, and she helps him accept
those hidden parts of himself as valid and beautiful, all while learning those
lessons for herself as well.
Much like the K-Drama romances I discussed previously, something
that also really appeals to me about this film is that the plot is packed, thus
the romance doesn’t take away from or subsume it, but exists alongside it. The
main themes of the story are more about magic, war and peace, and complex
characters than just solely being about romance or having the romance be the
major focus. Furthermore, a lot of Howl and Sophie’s relationship is about
learning to trust themselves and thus each other, as well as the power of
having someone believe in you. For Sophie, a lot of the story is about learning
self-confidence, while for Howl a lot of the story is about learning to be a
better person. Thus, while the story features them learning to love each other,
it also features them learning how to love themselves and/or the others around
them, which makes for a beautiful, satisfying tale that I’ll never get tired of
talking about. I feel like I’ve only just begun to scratch the surface of discussing
all the things this wonderful film has to say, which is also true of the next film
I’d like to discuss.
Ashitaka and
San from Princess Mononoke
Of the relationships on this list, Ashitaka and San from the 1997 Studio Ghibli film Princess Mononoke might be the most unique (and the one I most wanted to discuss). The film focuses on the conflict between humans and the gods of the forest as we follow young prince Ashitaka, who finds himself in the middle of the conflict due to being cursed by a demon – which turns out to be a forest god corrupted by human influence. Seeking a cure for the curse, he eventually encounters a girl named San, who was raised by the wolf goddess Moro. Because San was raised among the wolves, she hates humans and actively fights against them, leading to the nickname “Princess Mononoke,” a mononoke being a term for dangerous supernatural beings. However, both characters are soon swept up by the two warring factions – the humans represented by an iron-producing town of outcasts that thrives but does so at the expense of the forest, and the forest-dwelling gods who are corrupted by this human interference.
The dynamic between Ashitaka and San is fascinating for a
few reasons, chiefly because they don’t really get a traditional happy ending,
but they also don’t get a particularly sad one either. Naturally, because of
San’s hatred of humanity, the pair’s first interactions are marked by her
hostility and suspicion of Ashitaka, but it’s clear that he has feelings
towards her that are decidedly more tender. When they are both injured during
their first real encounter, there comes a moment where San wants to take
advantage of the situation and kill him, but is shocked when he calls her
beautiful, thus halting her attack. But more than just finding her beautiful,
he also asserts that he did not want to see harm come to her, something which
continues throughout the film. San too, despite her hatred of humans,
eventually comes to care about what happens to Ashitaka, but again, this
doesn’t lead to a traditional happy ending, which is part of what I appreciate
about their story.
It's made very clear that Ashitaka is in love with San - when San is in danger, Moro
even asks him “can you save the girl you love?” Moro also tells San “that boy wanted to share his life with
you,” when Ashitaka sets off, to which San vehemently insists “I hate him! I
hate all humans!” However, it’s clear that attitude is in the process of
morphing and indeed has completely morphed by the end of the film when she tells
him, “you mean so much to me.” However, there is another part to that
statement. While the easy, predictable route would be to have the pair enter
into a romantic relationship in the aftermath of all this pain, sorrow, and
destruction, the film does not take this option explicitly. Although San has
come to care for Ashitaka, she also tells him, “I can’t forgive the humans for
what they’ve done” and he accepts this. Instead, the story ends with Ashitaka
helping to rebuild the town and promising he’ll visit San in the forest, where
she will remain to help it heal.
I absolutely love the open-ended nature of the relationship
between these two characters. It’s clear they both care deeply about one
another, and it probably can be assumed that eventually they would enter into a
romantic relationship with one another; but rather than hurry that along or
attempt to shoe-horn its development into the events of the story, it’s allowed
to end in what feels like a very logical place, even if it’s not a traditional
one. And even so, because the romance does not come to fruition in front of us,
I feel it would be just as valid to imagine that they actually don’t become
romantic partners after all, but remain in a sort of undefinable relationship –
or, one might even say, a non-traditional one.
In fact, the notion of non-traditional types of people and
groups is a big theme in the movie, and part of what makes it special.
Something that many viewers, myself included, likewise appreciate about this
film is the complicated nature of its themes and characters. For instance, Iron
Town – the main human settlement of the movie – are a group of marginalized
people trying to get by, so rather than portray them as uniformly evil or
corrupt, we are forced to see they are not bad people, rather are people who do
bad things. Lady Eboshi, one of the antagonists, could have likewise been explicitly
portrayed as a stereotypical villain, and while her actions are often at the
heart of the story’s main problems, it almost feels as if it’s left up to
viewer interpretation to decide if her motives are pure or exploitative as she
employs and defends the people of Iron Town. I think the conclusion can change
depending on the watcher, which is something I absolutely love in any media.
This nuance also extends to Ashitaka and San. In the former,
we see the struggle not to give into hatred and anger, things the curse he’s
been afflicted with represent. In the latter, we see that same struggle, and it
may be justified given the things the humans are doing to her forest. But we
also see that hatred blinds San and for a long time is one of her sole
motivating factors. Therefore, I love that the end gives San a chance to heal
from this hatred and rage, channeling her energies not into a romance per se,
but into a connection of trust with someone she never would have trusted before,
and a new purpose as she works to help the forest heal. Too often in media,
both of these characters would find healing in a romance that is clearly
spelled out for us as such. But the fact that both characters come to trust,
respect, and value one another in a way that is up to interpretation is
extremely special for them as characters and for me as an aspec viewer.
Milo and Kida
from Atlantis: The Lost Empire
My last example moves into Western animation with the 2001 Disney film, Atlantis: The Lost Empire. The story centers on – you guessed it – the lost empire of Atlantis, which sinks into the sea at the film’s beginning, thus vanishing from the world and becoming known to everyone as a myth. Centuries later, a young linguist named Milo Thatch believes very passionately that Atlantis exists; more than that, he believes it’s possible to get there and that he can crack to code to do so. Naturally, this gets him labeled as something of a conspiracy theorist, and he is mocked and disrespected by virtually everyone… until the day when his hunches are proven true, and he’s commissioned as part of a team to go and discover the truth about this long-forgotten place. Following a perilous and difficult journey, the team is surprised to find Atlantis as an ancient but thriving civilization, led by an aged king, as well as his tough-as-nails, no-nonsense daughter, Princess Kida.
During the course of the film's latter half, Milo and Kida form a bond and do eventually fall in love. At first glance,
this might seem like something that’s been done before; in particular, the
notion of an explorer falling in love with the native of a different
place may feel like something already seen in everything from Pocahontas
to Stargate, and eventually repeated in future stories. And while that
is indeed true, I believe Milo and especially Kida are fleshed out more than
many of the characters in such stories usually are. Furthermore, I feel their
relationship is not really shown as a very overtly romantic one, and I
appreciate that.
For instance, the pair never kiss during the course of the
film. While they are eventually shown together in the end, and we see moments
of affection such as a hug or holding one another’s hands, I enjoy the fact
that the romance doesn’t need to be telegraphed with a kiss scene. The film
does have a direct-to-video sequel during which Kida and Milo are described as
a married couple; I’ve never seen this movie, so I can’t say how their
relationship is portrayed, but I thought that part at least was worth
mentioning (the rest of the movie, however, doesn’t sound too great, I must
admit). Even so, I think this furthers the fact that Milo and Kida’s
relationship is a match built on connection and trust, one that would flourish
as they work hard together, and those are some of my favorite types of
relationship.
Moreover, I think Kida is a great example of a female
character who isn’t just “the love interest.” Growing up, I thought Kida was
amazing, and I desperately wanted to be her because she was an amazing kick-ass
character who was fearless, brave, and self-sacrificing. As an adult, I realize
I am much more Milo (clumsy history dork with an earnest belief in things many
other people can’t see) than Kida, but I’m okay with that because the film
allows both characters to be fleshed out and explored in really amazing ways,
which makes their romance even better.
Furthermore, romance is not their main goal or only dream;
in fact, a lot of the plot centers on Milo’s dream of finding Atlantis and willingness
to do whatever it takes to get there. Early in the film, when discussing the
fact that no one believes him, Milo passionately declares “I’ll show
them. I will make them believe… I’ll find Atlantis on my own if I have
to rent a rowboat!” This same passion can be seen in Kida’s eagerness to secure
a better future for Atlantis and her people, who have stagnated over the long
centuries. I love that dreams are a huge part of the film’s plot and themes,
for both the main couple and everyone else. For instance, the members of the
adventuring crew are all hoping to score a big payday on the expedition so they
can each fulfill various dreams, each suited to their unique personalities.
Even the closing song that plays over the film’s end credits is called “Where the Dream Takes You,” which speaks beautifully to Milo’s need to chase this impossible
dream.
In my opinion – one that seems to be shared with other fans and
critics alike – Atlantis is underrated and terrific. The diverse cast of
characters has an amazing amount of depth and uniqueness, each one offering
something special to the story. Likewise, Milo Thatch is a great protagonist
primarily because he’s not just in a non-traditional relationship, but as a
weaker, less stereotypically masculine character, he’s also a non-traditional
hero. Meanwhile Kida is an amazing character in her own right – strong but
willing to accept help from others, with a curious zeal to learn and intense
passion to work for the benefit of her society. These strong themes and
messages make up the core of the story; as such, the romance is just one more
element of an already terrific tale about terrific characters going on one extraordinary
adventure for the ages. Out of the three films on this list, this is the only
one I saw as a child and honestly, the fact that I geeked out and obsessed
about this film as much then as I do now makes so much sense.
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| Image description: Milo and Kida holding one another's hand at the end of Atlantis: The Lost Empire |
Perhaps animated media can teach other media a thing or two
about how to tell meaningful stories about well-rounded, well-developed
characters. These stories can involve romance, they can feature characters that
fall in love, but they can also feature new spins on these topics too that show
all people that romance in the traditional sense is not the only way to express love or end a story. So many of us have been taught to expect romance as “normal”
and to assume that everyone experiences love in the same way throughout the
course of their lifetime; media often enforces that by showing us stories with very
“normal” relationship dynamics about two people who fall in love in very conventional
ways. But I think the best stories show that sometimes the course of true love
doesn’t always run smooth. Sometimes it requires work and time and growth, both
together or separate. Sometimes it perhaps doesn’t end in the tidiest manner.
But that doesn’t make these relationships any less valid.
I believe the couples I mentioned in this post show us how
valuable these non-traditional paths can be. I’m always on the lookout for
these types of relationships and I know I’ll find more if I look – not to
mention I know there are many I haven’t even had a chance to discuss yet, in
animated movies and other forms of media alike. Unique relationships of all kinds
speak to me because they remind me that unique paths are valid. They remind me
it’s okay to be different. And they give me hope that maybe there are more
stories like that hiding in plain sight. At the end of hardships, they seem to
say, something good is waiting – and often, that thing is not what you might
expect. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I think that’s a pretty darn
lesson to teach and be taught.
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