More Recommendations From My Friends

Image description: Although Max (right) and El (left) from Stranger Things are not in today's post, they are a very timely friendship that I really love. Thus, they nicely represent this post, full of more recommendations from my own friends. Read on to find out which three characters that may be aspec or have aspec tendencies I'll be discussing today, and thanks to my pals as always!

Near the end of 2020, I did a unique and special post all about characters that my friends feel might be on the asexual and/or aromantic spectrums. I loved this post because it not only broadened my horizons, allowing me to cover media I myself have not consumed, but it also allowed me to discuss aspec topics with my very dear friends, which is something I always enjoy. It makes me excessively happy when my friends get excited to tell me about a character with aspec vibes, or when they share character moments with me using the preface, “I saw this and thought of you immediately.” These phenomena aren’t just limited to 2020 or to that post, so I felt it was time once again for a post where my friends help me out. Just like last time, the characters discussed within this post will be diverse, and the methods in which my friends came across them will likewise be unique. In general, I can’t wait to talk about each of these characters and pass along the things my friends taught me about these subjects.

Spoiler warning! 

Hades (2020 game)
Robin Hood, BBC series (various episodes)

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My first recommendation from a friend today is courtesy of my best friend, who told me all about the video game Hades. As the title probably implies, Hades is a Greek mythology-based game which centers on the Underworld and the characters that populate it. The main character is Hades’ son, Zagreus, who is attempting to escape from the Underworld, but dies each time he tries and respawns back in the Underworld to try again. The mechanics of the game not only allows each “death run” to improve upon the last due to treasures, experiences, and upgrades, but each return to home base allows the player to explore the stories of the people in the Underworld, often befriending, assisting, and even potentially romancing them.

It's usually fairly common in an RPG to have romance options. A diverse RPG – such as the Dragon Age series – may sometimes add variation to the standard formula by including romances that are dependent on the sexuality of a character (for instance, in Dragon Age: Inquisition, the character of Dorian is gay and thus can only be romanced by a male character, while characters like Cullen or Cassandra are straight and thus can only be romanced by a female character or a male character respectively). In the case of Hades, they do something very interesting, in that there are three characters you can potentially begin romance interactions with, and Zagreus doesn’t have a preference when it comes to the male Thanatos or the female Megaera; in fact, he can date both in a unique polyamorous relationship. But even more interestingly, the game introduces a third path through the character of Dusa, a path that goes in an even more unique direction.

Dusa is a little green gorgon girl who works in the House of Hades and has a little bit of hero worship for Zagreus as the prince of the Underworld. When it comes to her “romance,” it’s unique primarily because, while it may start off like any of the other romance paths, it becomes clear that Dusa should be seen as an aromantic asexual character. But even more noteworthy is how the game handles the entire thing, treating Dusa with respect, understanding, and acceptance. Her AroAce tendencies first show up when Zagreus gives her some ambrosia as a “token of his affection,” a term which gets her flustered (but not in the way one would typically expect). She hastily asserts that she likes Zagreus too, while also admonishing herself for thinking he means something apart from “just being friendly” with her. Zagreus’s reaction is, in my opinion, truly top-notch. He compliments Dusa deeply and says that, if she wanted such a thing, he would gladly be more than friendly. But he also makes it very clear that he would never want to risk their friendship and tells her in no uncertain terms that if she wants to draw the boundary line at remaining friends, he’s all right with it.

There is so much to unpack here already and we haven’t even gotten to the actual AroAce scene! To start, Zagreus complimenting Dusa (saying she’s “wonderful”) is not only very sweet, but it clearly makes Dusa very happy to hear, and she even says the compliments make her feel complete (more on that later). I really appreciate that, due to the various natures of Dusa’s character, the entire relationship between her and Zagreus is framed very deeply as a connection of people who understand one another and appreciate each other in ways few others do. The fact that Zagreus could see their connection becoming romantic but doesn’t require it is absolutely brilliant, since all too often, media makes friendship seem like a bad consolation prize when romance isn’t on the table. Even more often, media likewise makes it so that boundaries like these never get discussed or honored, so Zagreus making it clear he will never cross these boundaries is a delight and a half.

Keeping on this subject, another moment that I find really cute and noteworthy is when Dusa worries that Zagreus has only been nice to her because he’s been hoping for a romantic or sexual relationship. Not only does Zagreus immediately dispel that assumption, but he doesn’t blame Dusa for reaching that conclusion. Later, when Dusa asks to talk to him again after she’s had time to process everything, Zagreus assures her that whatever she wants to say to him is fine by assuring her “you can be yourself with me, Dusa, I promise.” (I haven’t even played this game, but I am heartily convinced that Zagreus is best boy, I will not be entertaining questions). 

Dusa’s response to this is likewise perfect. “I’m glad you put it that way,” she says, and I feel this one simple statement frames the conversation in such a way that makes it clear Dusa is speaking from a place of identity and not just preference when she kindly rejects Zagreus’s offer. She pays back the compliments by telling him he is kind and she’s learned much from him, but that she’s “not looking for an intimate relationship” and is not attracted to him “in that way.” Further cementing his best boy status, Zagreus takes this with grace and sweetness, telling Dusa that her response is almost a relief because “I cherish our friendship for what it is.” The only thing that concerns him is the possibility that she might not want to see him after all this, but she promises she’d really like him to continue to be her friend. They then happily agree that they’re friends for all eternity (everyone, Zag and Dusa really said BFFs, I’m emotional right now, please don’t look at me).

Image description: Dusa the hard-working gorgon from the game Hades. Even Dusa's green and purple vibes match the aro and ace flags - which, although coincidental I'm sure, is somehow so perfect.

As you can probably tell, I am endlessly impressed with how Dusa is written. Rarely do characters with aspec tendencies, especially aromantic ones, get portrayed as happy, self-confident, or likeable in the way Dusa is; she even has an amazingly complex arc focusing on self-development and learning to prioritize herself as she advances in the job she loves, which are amazing traits for any character, but especially for an aspec one. And of course, I am impressed in particular with how her relationship with Zagreus is portrayed. It's far too common that an allosexual character who expresses a romantic interest in a non-sexual or non-romantic character finds their aspec tendencies inconvenient and wrong, something to be stripped away so that the romantic and/or sexual desires of the allosexual character can be satisfied. It’s also common – both in media and in real life – that an aspec person’s identity is framed as almost insulting, as if it’s just an excuse or somehow a commentary on the allo person, rather than an inherent part of who they are. For the game to not only allow Dusa to be these things, but to support her in them through a character who could have otherwise been a love interest, is amazing, and the developers have my deepest respect.

Even beyond that, my respect just increases that the game doesn’t have Zagreus’s friendship with Dusa be awkward or begrudging, and her rejection of his romantic advances doesn’t lead to any type of simmering pining that muddies the friendship. Instead, their friendship/platonic love is not only portrayed as the only option, but truly the best option for both of them, and that’s beautiful to me. For a great example of this, let me return to what I mentioned earlier and the fact that Zagreus compliments Dusa, because I think it’s extraordinary that Dusa says the compliments make her feel complete, but not in a romantic sense. All too often, I feel like media makes it seem that such compliments are reserved for romantic and/or sexual partners only, and that oftentimes to enjoy them means to be in love with someone in these romantic or sexual senses. But for Dusa, she can feel great joy and completeness in being complimented by someone, but it doesn’t change that fact that she’s aspec, which is an amazing portrayal to see. It’s so refreshing to see a friendship that means so much to someone, and that neither party is showed as being poorer for being friends rather than a couple.

Unfortunately, in my own research into the character and her role in the game, it quickly became obvious that many players see Zag and Dusa’s relationship as disappointing because it ends up as a friendship. As I’ve made very clear before on the blog, I loathe the term “friendzoned,” and I find it especially disheartening to see so many players feel like Dusa friendzones Zagreus (aka, relegates him to a platonic relationship only), even though he himself seems extremely happy with the notion of being Dusa’s BFF. The saddest part of this is that many of these players aren’t actually angry at Dusa for this (as is often the case in scenarios where one character is seen as “friendzoning” another), and in fact they are upset primarily because they like Dusa and wish they could romance her.

However, the fact that they love Dusa’s character makes it even more disheartening to see that they can’t seem to accept this essential part of her personality. This is a common and disappointing struggle in fandom, and one that I think is especially rampant in fandoms for games such as these where player choice determines certain outcomes. Oftentimes, fans feel that because they would like to do something, they should be able to, and express disappointment when they can’t, often not realizing how much a character like Dusa could potentially mean to aspec players. While I can see why they’d like to romance her and their desires are certainly valid, it’s nevertheless sad to see how they don’t accept that which the game goes out of its way to painstakingly and thoughtfully portray.

Despite this, however, I can’t help but feel incredibly happy with Dusa as a character, and I only hope and pray that more developers will follow Hades and include complex aspec characters like Dusa in their games. The more we see of relationships like the one between Dusa and Zag, the better chance we have at showing people how important these types of characters and relationships are in media. From what I see, I feel like Dusa and Zagreus are two individuals who are made lonely by their circumstances, not necessarily a need for romance, and they find fulfillment in each other. The fact that it’s a platonic fulfillment should not be seen as a bummer, but rather a beautiful opportunity for stories about friendship and connections of all kinds. I’m so happy that my bestie brought these two to my attention.

Also, a bonus I’d like to include from my best friend talking about Hades that fits the theme is the character of Artemis. There are a lot of aspec mythology fans (myself included) who will doubtless point to Artemis as an example of aspec tendencies because she's a virgin goddess, so therefore it makes sense that the game would allude to this. But I’m once again delighted by the writers and developers of this game because I feel they once again went above and beyond. From what scant research I’ve done on how she’s portrayed in game, it seems they actually take the time to give Artemis some attributes that flesh this concept out, and then some. For example, when talking to Zagreus, Artemis mentions several times that she’s different from the other gods on Olympus and indeed often feels alone despite being among family members, or that they don’t understand her. While this could point to any number of things, it very much feels from an aspec point of view like something that could perfectly point to those tendencies.

There is an added layer of cuteness if the player befriends Artemis, because she’s even more open about these things and about the fact that the circle of people she enjoys spending time with is very small. She often mentions her woodland nymph friends, as well as the character of Callisto (whose story here seems a bit different than this same character in mythology). It seems to me like Artemis and Callisto might be in a romantic relationship – especially since she calls her “my Callisto” at one point – which may actually be keeping with and improving on some elements of Artemis's real-life mythology. If they are together, that could potentially mean they are in an asexual romance, which would be wonderful. Either way, I think Artemis repeatedly mentioning Callisto and the woodland nymphs, and her preference in spending her time with them, is a way of showing this is where and with whom Artemis feels understood. Rather than just having her be “the goddess of the hunt,” the game makes it that being on the hunt and in the woods is where Artemis truly feels like she can be herself, and I love that.

Artemis also has dialogue where she expresses annoyance at her father Zeus’s desire to see her paired off – something I’m sure many people of various identities can relate to, but which feels very familiar to a lot of aspec people in particular, I’m sure. Zeus describes Artemis as “willfully uninclined to take a mate at all”; Artemis responds interestingly, saying there are people “yearning to marry or embarrass me,” and adds sardonically “for some reason, I prefer to spend my time mostly alone or with my nymph friends in the woods,” which again, feels very aspec affirming. In general, Hades does an amazing job portraying this character and fleshing her out in moments like these. I could probably talk endlessly about Artemis as a mythological figure and interpretations over the years of her virginity/how that relates to asexuality in the modern day. Honestly, thinking about how much I enjoyed Artemis as a child is probably an early indicator that I was going to be an asexual geek someday, and so seeing her in this game gives my inner child great joy.

Image description: Artemis, virgin goddess of the moon and the hunt, as she appears in the game Hades.

The final recommendation comes from my good friend Laura, but this one is a little different. While my other recommendations from friends – both in this post and in the previous one – are from media I haven’t experienced, this one is actually from something I watched and loved back in the day. However, as I wasn’t familiar with asexuality or its related identities back when I first watched the show and haven’t watched it in years, Laura’s suggestion was a new and awesome revelation to me. The show is BBC’s Robin Hood, which I’m sure you can guess was a take on the classic tale of Robin Hood and his merry men; the character is one of those merry men, the character of Much, who in this version is portrayed as Robin’s loyal manservant who accompanies him back home to England following years of fighting in the Crusades.

Laura brought this example to my attention thanks in large part to something she saw on TV Tropes about how Much might be on the asexual spectrum. This can be found on the TV Tropes page for Robin Hood the mythical figure in a section dedicated specifically to the BBC series. In it, they mention how Much’s actor, Sam Troughton, envisioned him as asexual, and Laura said she knew she had to tell me immediately (for which I am always very grateful). You may in the past have heard me talk about the concept of “Word of God” representation, in which the creator of a piece of media confirms something about a character or plot point that is otherwise not explicitly stated in the source material for whatever reason. For instance, whenever I’ve discussed the “Archivist Wasp” books by Nicole Kornher-Stace, the main characters of those novels are what would be considered “Word of God” representation because the author has stated outside the work that that they are on the asexual spectrum. However, in the case of Much’s actor describing him as asexual, TV Tropes refers to that type of representation as “Word of Saint Paul,” in reference to the biblical figure.

“Word of Saint Paul” isn’t “Word of God” representation per se because it doesn’t come from the creator of the work; it does, however, come from someone who is in the know regarding the media (in this case, the actor who brought the character to life), which can lead to it being seen as somewhat credible, even if it is a few shades off of being officially confirmed. In this case, because the show has been off the air for over ten years, I find it extremely unlikely we ever would get confirmation about Much being written by the creators as a non-sexual character, so the fact that Sam Troughton envisioned the character as such is probably as good as we’ll get. But you know what? That’s enough for me.

When Laura told me about this tidbit on TV Tropes, I immediately felt like it fit. Although Much does have some notable times where he expresses interest in women, those instances often seem entirely non-sexual. While this particular retelling was, by its very nature, never going to be very overt about anything sexual, it really does seem to me like Much is almost always expressing romantic interest only, rather than sexual interest, when he falls for women. There are two examples of Much’s romantic interests that come to mind – the first is in a one-off episode where he falls for a woman named Eve and she for him, a relationship that doesn’t really get to come to fruition due to plot reasons; the second is in the show’s third season where he develops a crush on a woman called Kate, another relationship that doesn’t go anywhere because she doesn’t reciprocate his feelings. Both of these instances seem very innocent and almost schoolboy-esque in a way I feel could really support the notion of Much being a heteroromantic asexual.

In other instances, Much actually seems uninterested in romance as a general concept in an almost aromantic asexual way. While this is likely due to the age-old problem of inconsistent writing – with some of the show’s writers seeing him as more likely to want a relationship and others deciding it lends itself to a plot point or moment to have him not interested – it’s nevertheless interesting. One such example is in a scene where the gang, convinced they’ll likely die in an upcoming mission, take the time to confess secrets to one another in case they never get another chance to say them. During this time, the character Djaq confesses that she’s in love with another member of the group – Will Scarlett, who reciprocates. When they begin professing the reasons why they love one another, Much rolls his eyes and walks off, declaring the exchange to be boring.

In general, I think Much is an interesting character, and I can’t help but wonder if these moments really are inconsistencies or if they can be analyzed together as proof of just how deep his character runs. He has a lot of the hallmarks of certain other non-sexual or non-romantic characters, such as being the goofy sidekick type character who loves food (traits which are perfectly and unexpectedly in keeping with canon asexual characters like Todd Chavez from BoJack Horseman and Jughead Jones from the Archie Comics respectively); but then he goes much deeper than that, even as those around him try to treat him like a bumbling buffoon. 

At his core, I think Much is a character who wants to be respected, which a lot of aspec people can probably relate to. He’s a character who is struggling with the horrors he endured during his time fighting in the Holy Land and who longs to live a life free of those things. He’s someone for whom friendship and loyalty seem to be weighed so much more heavily than romance, despite moments where it may be included. As I write this post, remembering some things from back when I watched the show and looking up others to refresh my memory, I sort of want to take another spin through the series to analyze Much and all his moments, because I think there is a lot to unpack about him. Whether as an aspec character or just a character, I think he’s a great one.

Image description: Much in BBC's Robin Hood, based on the character of Much the Miller's Son from the original Robin Hood tales. In this version he is Robin's steadfast manservant and closest friend, a character whose actor envisioned him as asexual. And, as this picture proves, he nicely matches the green vibes of the other two characters in this post.

In general, looking at recommendations from my friends is always one of my favorite things to do. These three characters represent a great selection of various types of characters from various types of media, as was true in my previous recommendations post, and that gives me hope. It’s entirely possible that, not only will more media come to exist that gives us a fighting chance at good aspec representation, but perhaps there’s aspec representation hiding in plain sight. It also gives me hope that if we bring these aspec identities and characters into the light, more people will notice and appreciate them for what they are.

But these types of posts are not just an exercise in finding representation; as always, they are first and foremost an expression of gratitude to my supportive friends. I am always so flattered, not just by their suggestions of potentially aspec characters, but in how they all care about aspec stories and experiences too. I am just one voice, but their efforts help magnify that voice in a way that means the world to me. As always, thank you for helping me expand my horizons by pointing out things I might otherwise miss. You are a huge part of the reason why I’m able to be the asexual geek I am today, and I hope you never, ever stop recommending new and amazing characters to me in future.

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